“…I’m exhausted.”

From start to end of the inspection, the princess’ naivety had me on edge. Despite my welcoming the crown prince of Elda for an inspection, the objective and intended principle had been derailed completely.

The princess also intended to partake in today’s dinner. However, seeing Elda’s crown prince surprised her so much she cried out, “I refuse to dine with the prince of an enemy country!” That was followed with, “Don’t try to do something as cowardly as poisoning me!”

Both my aunt and Eric, who were having dinner, were left shocked.

Eric just tensed up, while my aunt suffered a full-blown panic attack and fainted.

My aunt might be reliving the trauma of losing my mother.

Is the princess trying to start a war?

“…Perhaps the night breeze will calm me down.”

I was so full of anxiety, I couldn’t sleep in the slightest.

Well, even without the princess, I haven’t been sleeping well lately…

When I slept, I always dreamed of what happened on the battlefield. Of the companions I met.

Of the names of those I killed.

The war was over, but my heart remained on the battlefield, almost as if I had left it behind.

“The wind is a bit cold, but it’s refreshing nonetheless.”

After passing through the back gate of the mansion, I came across a pond. I approached it, gazing at the moon reflected in the water.

The princess said that she’d build, ‘a country where everyone is happy.’

My comrades and those who went to war didn’t die for such ideals. I didn’t want such a thing either.

I simply fought to protect.

Some fought to protect their families, some their loves, their friends, their daily lives—or even all of them.

“A country where everyone is happy.”

“Even though the country stole our happiness.”

At the center of the pond stood a man with blood flowing down his head. He was my former comrade-in-arms.

I was hallucinating.

I was aware of it, but I couldn’t avert my eyes.

“Why did I have to die?”

My comrade-in-arms asked me,

“Why did I have to be killed?”

A knight from an enemy country I once killed asked me,

“Why did you ruin our lives!? Give it back! Give me back my son! Give us back our lives!”

The villagers whom I couldn’t protect were crying as they blamed me,

—Chapon.

I found myself in the middle of the pond.

While I was caught up with the hallucinations, I seemed to have continued walking forward. The water had already reached my waist. If I had taken another step, I’d have drowned.

Just one more step, and I’d die—

—but I can’t.

That one step, I absolutely mustn’t take it.

“You aren’t going to end it?”

The crown prince, Milan, stood at the edge of the pond.

“I can’t.”

“Why?”

“Because I’ve taken too many lives, and also because I’ve lost so many. I can’t choose the easy way out. While it may sound conceited of me, I have to live and make amends.”

“No one can blame you.”

The words of Prince Milan were akin to a sweet poison. I wanted to indulge in them and die.

“Maybe so. Still, I can’t afford to die. No matter how easily taken or replaced by numbers they are, lives aren’t cheap. To protect those lives, we made many sacrifices. We, who survived, mustn’t die.”

How much easier would it be if I could take this one step?

I had trouble holding myself back.

Thus, I gritted my teeth, clenched my fist, and endured.

---

***T/N: Lol is this prince just gonna watch

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