I was just as excited as I was the other day.

Despite my mental age being around 40, I twirled my skirt in front of the dresser to check my whole body. 

“What do you think, Angie? Do I look like a city merchant’s daughter?”

“I only see a noble lady traveling incognito in disguise.”

“That’s not what I want…”

I slumped my shoulder at the retorting of the calm ladies’ maid.

“Lady Philia can’t possibly hide as a city girl. Your hair and skin are polished, and above all, your mannerisms are completely different.”

“Then I wonder how it will be if I put on a hat. I’ll just let the movements fall into place when the time comes.”

“Even if you could fake it, I’m afraid Lord Luca will spoil everything. There’s no way he can blend into the streets.”

It was true that Luca had a beautiful, otherworldly appearance, a refined manner down to his toes, and an air of privilege that made people obey him as a matter of course. If a young man like him walked down the city’s streets, he would stand out. 

“I will put a hat on Luca as well to make him blend in with the crowd… Today’s destination is the royal botanic garden and the cafe I have always wanted to visit. It will be a pain to encounter an acquaintance aristocracy in the botanical garden. Plus, I want to go to the cafe as a normal customer; that’s why a disguise is necessary.”

Today was the day I would retry my plan “Enjoying the loving life of mutual lovers” that failed before. 

To show our harmonious engagement, we had been going to more and more evening and tea parties. Luca’s excessive passion for physical intimacy had been overly satisfying, but what we’ve been missing was the wholesome lovers’ relationship.

The phone calls and mail when we couldn’t see each other, the fidgeting feeling when you were waiting for a rendezvous, the thrill of seeing the world in a new light just by linking your hands and taking a walk. 

Although there were some impossible parts since it was different from the previous life, we didn’t have enough of those things in our love affairs.

We had been living in the same house for a long time. Luca always wanted to be by my side when we were at home and when he’d around me, he didn’t retain his composure, putting his hands on my dress, licking on my ear or neck, so I couldn’t even calm down. Even when it was mealtime, and we sat on separate seats, his love-hungry gazes never separated from me while elegantly finishing his meal.

Rather than saying that it left my heart throbbing, it instead made my heart throb from the fear of what he might do to me at any moment.

Leaving aside my mental disposition, I was also a young 21-year-old maiden. Even though I had a lover, just the days of drowning in passion would wear away my paltry maiden’s heart.

Since it was already confirmed that we would be marrying soon, our lovers’ time was only now. During this precious time, I decided that this was not the way to go, and I meticulously planned for today.

I was determined not to fail this time, but Angela was skeptical.

“I wonder if Lord Luca will let the young lady out like this. He nitpicked about our best work at the evening party, making things difficult for us, which was awful.”

“But this dress isn’t exposing skin, unlike the nightdress.”

“No, unlike a lady’s dress, its hem is short, and you aren’t wearing a corset either, so your body lines are in plain sight. No matter what the young lady wears, it would definitely look lewd. No, it looks sexy.”

“Angie… You were thinking that?”

Angela swiftly rephrased, but I heard it perfectly. I was mildly shocked. 

Certainly, Philia’s body was slim and elegant, befitting an R-18 game character; it was a uselessly erotic body where only the feminine parts are voluptuous. I felt that a city girl’s appearance wearing a shirt and skirt didn’t give a prim and proper impression, but I wanted to think it was just my imagination.

“But it should be all right if I wear a coat. I’ve been begging and appeasing and telling Luca since yesterday, so he’ll be fine today.”

My plan had already started the day before so that it didn’t happen as the other day. However, I had almost exhausted myself just for the one point, to make sure the main person, Luca, didn’t act recklessly. So inevitably, I had to resist falling into a precarious situation from being unable to stand up for the whole day from being wrecked by his embrace.

I once tried pleading cutely shamelessly before, but it had the completely opposite effect. So I took advantage of my position as the older sister to politely admonish him and somehow get him to agree.

However, the body of an 18-year-old was a different creature from the head, apparently. Hence, I had no choice but to appease the restless Luca with the first intercrural sex in my life passed through my previous life, and he was finally able to sleep in peace.

It was not like I didn’t feel misgiving about using any way to protect my maiden’s heart desperately, but anyway, I had reached today just as I had planned.

All I had to do was wait for Luca to return from his early morning visit to the royal castle, get him dressed, and go out.

As I was looking outside through the window nervously, I noticed a familiar carriage approaching in the front yard.

“He has returned. Angie…”

“Even if you don’t call him, he will rush here in no time.”

Angela said before calling out for Luca. This outstanding ladies’ maid seemed to be acting ahead of my words recently. As if to prove her words, the door opened without much wait.

“Welcome ba—”

It was déjà vu. I was sensing an incredible déjà vu. 

Luca hugged me, clasped my chin, and gave an intense and suffocating kiss. No matter whether I struck on his shoulder or scratched him, he didn’t stop. When we finally separated, he scooped my legs and lifted me gently.

“Luca!?”

As I was puzzled by my fiancé’s uncharacteristically out-of-control behavior, Angie saw us off and headed towards the room with an expression of “Not again.” Although Luca’s appearance was strange, she hadn’t noticed.

Luca put me on the bed rougher than usual and leaned over silently. His face was pale and stiff, and only his green eyes were expressing his gloomy and intense passion.

I gave the strongest resistance I had ever done till now at his rough action.

“Stop it, Luca. Stop it…”

“Sister… Are you going to refuse me?”

“That’s right, what exactly happened? You even promised me last night.”

Luca didn’t reply and instead put both his hands around the dress’s collar and easily tore it apart. It wasn’t an expensive piece of clothing, but I was stunned at the dull sound of fabric ripping.

I had been looking forward to this day for a long time, and I had asked Angela to prepare some popular Western-style clothes for me.

I was more annoyed than saddened at this being mercilessly torn up. Thinking about his actions beforehand, I knew Luca’s appearance was unusual, but rather than worrying about it, I let the frustration well inside me and lashed out furiously.

“No, definitely not!”

I twisted my body to reject Luca’s attempt to hug me and grabbed the sheets to try to escape.

The heavy weight that had been pining down to bed lightened for a moment, and when I was about to crawl on my stomach, I was suddenly pressed down from behind.

“I have said it, right? I will not let you run away.”

Seeing that Luca had bound my hand together with my torn shirt left me stunned.

I was lying face down with my hands behind my back. At my wit’s end, I felt him rolling up my skirt. I felt my head turning strange in shame while feeling him lowering down my underwear and exposing my lower body that had been only covered with thin stockings.

“S-Stop… Luca.”

Luca’s gloveless hand stroked butt’s roundness, kneading it soothingly. Knowing that my private part that shouldn’t be seen exposed as he forced open my twin hills, I shook my head while burying my face in a sheet.

“No, I said to stop!”

“But, sister… You are wet.”

Luca whispered with a sweet voice showing his unconcealed delight. To tease me, he traced my female part with his finger. It made the nasty wet sound, forcing me to realize Luca wasn’t lying.

Despite him being so rough, I wondered if it was due to being kissed or touched by the person I love that made that place moist, even if it wasn’t as much as usual. When Luca put his hand between my thighs from behind and stroked the sensitive area, power slipped out of my abdomen, and I could feel it flooding.

“Are you feeling good? Even sticking out your butt…”

My lower body naturally loosened, and I fell on my knees when he touched me from behind. It turned into a shameful appearance as if I were begging for it. Even when I tried to twist around, Luca’s hand was inside my thighs and firmly holding my knees; it looked like a beast mating.

“Luca, please… stop…”

I felt soft lips on my butt and thighs, and I somehow understood what Luca was trying to do. His fingers that were stroking my wet bud and the entrance pushed open the crack, and Luca’s tongue slipped in from behind with his face buried in the spot.

It was as if sparks were flying in front of my eyes.

A shiver that was more like a chill than a pleasant sensation ran up my spine, and I screamed, unable to endure the tingling sensation in my body. The stimulation from the superficial pistoning of the soft tongue was completely different from the usual penetration, but it was intense enough to melt my lower body. 

The sound of water churning in the muddy slush came from an impossible place and drove me over the edge.

“Amazing… You’re so soaked. My sister’s body is too lewd to become like this even though you’re shouting to stop.”

Luca said as if reproaching me. I could only open my sloppy mouth and pant for breath. Normally speaking, these words would hurt, but I sensed discomfort in that tone.

Luca wasn’t intentionally saying to look down on me. He was bashful about speaking his honest feelings, but that was his honest feeling, and he didn’t mean it that way. With his tone of voice and how Luca touched me now, I felt as if he was trying to tease me somehow.

“Aren’t you going to turn out like this when touched by another man? It’s an adorable thing to see you resisting with your slender arms. Although you say you have a fiancé, when you are forced, you get wet like this, don’t you?”

“Luca…”

I forcefully twist my body to look at Luca behind me. My adorable lover’s face looked somewhat teary, and his green eyes contorted in pain.

“You wouldn’t normally say something like that. Did something happen?”

Luca bit his lip as if he was flabbergasted. Seeing his expression, I realized I should’ve first spoken to him properly.

My mentality was already comparable to an adult, but even if Luca looked like an adult, he was still an 18-year-old, and his feelings were sometimes more fragile than those of other young men his age.

“For now, untie my hands. I can’t hug you like this.”

“Sister…”

When he freed my arms, I turned to Luca and hugged him. Then I asked him while caressing his loose and quirky platinum blonde hair.

“What’s the matter? It wasn’t like you at all to speak like that.”

“I saw a terrifically detestable thing…”

Luca replied while giving a low growl and clinging to me like a child.

“I know it wasn’t real, yet I felt as if you had been stained. I wanted to touch you for real, but being rejected made my blood boil. When I felt that I had done the exact same thing as I had read, I didn’t know what was going on anymore.”

“I’m sorry, I don’t understand…”

“That may be so. But I definitely don’t want to go into details.”

I breathed a sigh of relief as I looked at his pouting expression as he tightly pinched his mouth.

“If you don’t want to say, then don’t say. I will not force you no matter how angry I am, okay?”

“I know you will be. I was that rough…”

I was almost moved by his downcast, dejected eyes and sad face, but that was something I had to say seriously for the sake of our future.

“I’m not talking about this; I was furious when you broke our promise for today.”

“By promise, you mean the outing plan?”

“That’s right, you tore apart my shirt, and we have to cancel today. Even though I have been looking so forward to it.”

My plan and effort were all for naught. 

Far from the wholesome lovers’ relationship, I even ended up taking a glimpse of a carnal world that I hadn’t experienced in my previous life. I felt like our intimacy experienced another heavy development. 

I wondered if my maiden heart was still all right.

“I’m sorry, sister. I will definitely make it up to you.”

“Really? Next time, you’ll have to go out with me properly.”

“Yes, I know.”

A lot happened, but after receiving his promise, I was so happy that I let down my guard. I thoroughly forgot the kind of situation I was in. As I was thinking about executing my next plan, I felt Luca hand’s wriggling around my thighs.

“Luca!”

“Since we can’t go out anymore, please let me finish what we started yesterday.”

Even though he was depressed a while ago, he suddenly began to touch me with passionate eyes like usual. Where did your earlier repentance go?

“It felt really good to rub between your thighs, but I really like the tightening sensation in you.”

It was just like Luca to say things like that with a straight face.

Even more than his criticism that I was lewd earlier, I had a strong feeling that something was shaving off, but I was glad he returned to his usual self… I hoped. 

It was hard to give permission verbally, but I managed to nod my head because, unlike Luca, I had a human sense of shame.

Luca acted swiftly after gaining my approval. He grabbed the back of my knee with his large palm and forced me into a foldable position. I was able to do it because my body was rather flexible, but I was astonished at my posture as it was an embarrassing part of my body that came into my view.

“It’s wet enough… It’s fine, right?”

At the display of savage, towering object thrusting into me and the agony of the position made my voice more nasally and high pitched than usual. I reached out for something to cling to, and Luca pulled me into a tight hug.

We both sought each other’s lips while being tightly glued in this position.

I wrapped my legs around Luca’s waist as he kissed me while thrusting deep inside me. Luca laughed happily, his breath uneven.

“Your inside is really tightening as I kiss you and thrust inside you.”

As always, there was no room for embarrassment at his expression’s frankness, and I twisted my body to match Luca’s movements.

“Only I know that you like being done in a position like this… right?”

“Of course…”

In my previous life and this life, there was no one with whom I had such a deep and intense relationship as with Luca. 

Even when I looked at him to inquire what he wanted to ask, I didn’t get any answer. Instead, his drilling motion became even swifter.

I fell into disorder from the intense attack, and in the end, I didn’t get to know what he wanted to ask me, but we hugged each other again and again as if we were melting together.

In the future, the plan to go out might be achieved, but I felt that it would be hard to expect a wholesome and heart-pounding lovers’ relationship from my fiance.

I also felt just a bit of regret that it might be partly my fault.

Midnight.

In one room of the Duke’s mansion, the hearth was burning bright red.

Luca stood in front of it and stared at the blazing fire motionlessly. The flames’ swaying was eerily illuminating his beautiful face which was devoid of expressions, just like a fine sculpture.

A leather-bound book was open in his gloved hand. Then he abruptly tore a page from it and tossed it inside the hearth’s flame. 

The paper turned to ash instantly without a sound.

The sound of paper being torn off continued regularly.

The sound earlier wasn’t loud, but Philia’s body lying on the bed stirred, and she woke up. With hazy, half-dreaming eyes, she spotted Luca standing with his back to her.

“Luca? Aren’t you going to sleep…?”

“I’m sorry, did I wake you? It was chilly, so I lit the hearth.”

“Are you cold?”

“I’m going to bed. You go ahead and get some rest.”

She nodded and, exhausted, lay down on the bed again as if someone had cut her strings, and soon, he heard her deep breathing.

Looking at her figure for a while, Luca once again resumed his activity. When the whole book disappeared in the flame and turned to ash, Luca took off his gloves and threw them into the hearth.

No longer looking at the flames, which had grown stronger as if they were a spark, he made his way to the bed where the woman he loved was sleeping.

He sat down on the bed’s edge and gazed at the calm face sleeping peacefully. It was vexing for him not to be able to see what kind of dream she was having, and he raised his eyebrows.

He couldn’t allow any other man except him to appear in Philia’s dream or even Philia to appear in another person’s dream. He could burn physical things, but it was really annoying to be unable to smash apart and burn down the content of people’s heads.

Luca bent down and put his forehead against Philia’s. It was as if he wanted to enter her dream. 

“I don’t want to give even a fragment of my dream to anyone…”

No one else was there to hear his quiet and frenzied lovers’ talk.

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