19. Nigel’s Feeling
*Told from the perspective of Nigel.
When was the last time I had fallen for someone?
Nigel had been thinking so ever since his exchange with Eliane.
It was no good. No matter what kind of woman he looked at it, he just couldn’t fall in love.
Even so, there were times when he tried to be ‘loved’, and patiently talked to women several times.
But… in the end, it stayed the same.
Even though they looked happy, for some reason, my heart felt empty and I was not satisfied…
However, I was still a prince.
But having an amiable image about someone else alone wasn’t enough of a reason for me to marry them.
Despite so, I wondered it would be like to feel, ‘I want to get married with this person’!
Then, I met Eliane.
When I first saw her, it was as if an electric shock ran throughout my body, I was astonished.
—what a beautiful person.
Since then, I had become strange.
Whenever I saw her, it was as if I was losing my senses.
Speaking with her, I became too excited.
It had only been a short time since I met Eliane, but such was my honest thought;
I want to spend more time with her.
“My, what exactly is this feeling? It’s so unlike me.”
I remembered back to my conversation with her on that balcony.
As I thought, she was the saint of the neighboring kingdom.
I already felt something was weird when I saw her unusual healing magic.
…my suspicion became even more vivid when I found out she could communicate with Fenrir Ralph.
Fenrir wouldn’t let anyone they hadn’t acknowledged touch them.
Moreover, Ralph was special amongst his kind—no one beside my Father and I could touch him.
Due to that, feeding him was a strenuous activity for the servants.
Ralph didn’t let anyone touch his body easily, not even for healing.
But then, my Father and I saw an amazing sight—
—she approached Ralph, alone.
Contrary to expectations, Eliane easily patted Ralph.
Not only that, Ralph even let her ride him and they took a walk in the garden!
That surprised my Father and I. I was so amazed, I was at loss for words.
Is that because she’s an excellent healer—
—or because she’s a saint?
That wasn’t correct. Fenrir disliked people.
Fenrir was such a creature;
“Fenrir possess noble souls. They will never open their hearts unless the other person has a pure heart.”
To be able to get along with Ralph in one attempt, she must had possessed a pure heart.
I honestly thought so.
—Then I looked into her in more detail.
It was my role as a leading figure of the kingdom to uncover her nature, even if she was my benefactor. It was to prevent anything from happening.
However, part of me might had been confused—I ended up doing it more so because I wanted to, rather than because I was obliged to—
—I wanted to know more about her.
I was driven by such a personal feeling.
It was because she was an enigma.
High-level healing magic.
A heart that could win a Fenrir in one attempt.
Therefore, one thing was certain about her—
“You are that saint, aren’t you?”
Convinced, I confronted Eliane.
She tried to lie at first, but after some insistence, she confessed that she was indeed the saint.
When Eliane said she was going to leave Lynchgiham to prevent herself from being a hindrance, she looked as if she was about to cry.
Seeing that, I grew fonder of Eliane—
—I wanted to protect her.
I wanted to stay close to her.
Although she’d stay in Lynchgiham, she’ll be separated from me.
After all, I was the prince.
Once she left the royal palace, I wouldn’t be able to meet Eliane easily.
I hate that!
Before I realized it, I had already propositioned her to remain in the castle for a while.
Luckily, Eliane agreed with my suggestion.
I didn’t think I showed it on my face, but how relieved I was at that time!
“I want to converse more with her…”
After separating from Eliane, I lied on my back and reminisced.
“Haha, what has happened to me… this is the first I’ve ever been like this…”
I couldn’t fall in love no matter what.
Therefore, I didn’t understand the word ‘love’.
Maybe, this is what love is like?
I couldn’t sleep well that night because I couldn’t comprehend myself.
***T/N: Well… umm, let’s just say Author’s depiction of love at first sight, which is basically lust, is actually quite acurate?