Chapter Thirty-Six: When False Happiness Disappears

The lake seemed much quieter than in the summer.

As Lord William and I walked together, he walked very slowly, matching my pace. Every time I noticed this small kindness, my love for him grew bigger.

“Aren’t you cold?”

“No, the scarf is pretty thick.”

I tightened my brown and red-checked scarf.

Lord William nodded and walked leisurely again.

“It’s a shame we can’t go to the flower field, but… the lake is beautiful in autumn, too.”

The clear lake surface was akin to a mirror, reflecting the endless blue sky and white clouds. The clouds moved very quickly, and the sky changed its appearance every moment. The waves lapping on the water’s edge were calming, soothing the soul.

“In no time, the colors of the trees will deepen and it’ll look really mesmerizing. I wish I could take you there, but I’m so busy that I can’t promise anything.”

“I know. You’re a knight who protects the royal capital, Lord William. I’m sure Cedric also understand. But… please rest whenever you can afford to. It’d be terrible if you collapse again.”

“Thank you. My Lina is so kind.”

“No, not at all.’

My cheeks got hot from his sweet smile and I hid my face.

Lately, whenever we were alone, Lord William would call me by the nickname “Lina.” Whenever he did so, his voice would be as sweet as melted sugar with honey, my heart felt like it was going to explode.

I’d have to admit that ever since the day we fell in love, merely having Lord William beside me made my heart beat faster. When he smiled at me, I felt even happier than before. When he hugged me, I felt so happy that I almost cried.

The fact that he still said “I love you” despite having remembered everything drove me crazy.

Lately, I’d been so head over heels for Lord William that I was worried for myself.

“There’s a bench over there. Let’s sit for a bit. We can see Cedric from there.”

When I turned around, I could see Elsa and the others, albeit they seemed very small.

As Lord William approached the bench, he gently released my hand, took out a handkerchief, and placed it on the bench. Then, he took my hand again and led me to the bench. My heart fluttered at his gallantness.

Lord William sat next to me, put his sword at his side, clung to me, and embraced me. As I leaned against him, the fresh smell of his perfume enveloped me.

No words were spoken by either of us, and we simply stood close to each other, gazing at the magnificent nature that spread out before us.

“Rather than having you heard it from someone else, I’d rather tell you myself… about Rosalind.”

It was the name of his ex-fiancée, which Lord William had mentioned that day he regained his memory.

I looked up at him in surprise, and saw that he was looking at me with concern.

“It’s okay if you don’t want to listen about it…”

“No, please tell me… Was she an important person to you.”

Lord William was confused by my question.

“If you ask me whether she was important to me, I think she probably she was. But now that I’ve fallen in love you, I realized that my affection for her was no different than the affection I have for my sister or a friend. I’m the worst, aren’t I?”

Lord William shrugged his shoulders with a wry smile.

“The feelings I have for Lina and the feelings I have for her are completely different. …It may be because it was a political marriage and we were both still children. However, we were both aristocrats, and His Majesty also wanted us to marry. As a nobleman, I wasn’t dissatisfied with the marriage itself, but I think that even if we’d stayed married, it’d eventually fall apart.”

“…How is Lady Rosalind doing now?”

“She’s married and living peacefully far away from the royal capital. On a military inspection tour two or three years ago, I visited her secretly, without telling anyone. I saw her hanging the laundry with a young boy who looked a lot like her. Then, her husband came to help her and they looked very happy together. It also seemed like she was pregnant with another child. At the same time… briefly, her betrayal hurt me. But now, thanks to you, I feel very much at peace. She’s the woman I once thought I’d become a family with. I have come to think that as long as she’s living happily, then that is fine. I have my beloved Lina and cute Ceddie, so I’m just as happy.”

I smiled back at his softly narrowed blue eyes.

For a while afterward, I rested my head against his chest and listened to his heartbeat. The sound of the wind, his heartbeat, the rippling waves, the rustling of trees—the world was so peaceful and calm that it was frightening.

“What happened to Lady Sandra?”

As I gazed out at the lake and listened to the rhythmical sound of his heartbeat, I asked the question that I’d always wanted to ask, but couldn’t.

Lord William was busy, and Cedric always clung to him when he returned, so I didn’t have a chance to ask him.

The hand that was around my shoulder moved slightly as if to console me.

“After the autopsy, we looked for someone to take her body, but the Baron Dixley family had already been replaced. Her brother, the current head of the family, refused to recover her remains. We also asked several of her lovers, but they refused. …In the end, she was cremated, placed in an urn, and returned to Lord Ramos.”

Strangely, a warm feeling of relief spread in my chest.

In the Kingdom of Cression, in most cases, the deceased were buried and returned to the earth. Only those who died after contracting a serious, infectious disease, along with those who’d committed serious crimes were cremated. The former was because they were concerned about the spread of disease. So, after cremation, the bones were buried directly in the grave and the deceased was returned to earth.

However, the latter weren’t allowed to the rich earth of Cression. After the family took them, they’d say their goodbyes, and a small ceremony would be held. Afterward, they’d be placed in a special cemetery in a dungeon. If no one took them, they’d remain in darkness for eternity.

“I’ve forgiven Lady Sandra, but I still can’t forget all the horror she inflicted on me. After all, for most of my life, the woman named Sandra has tormented me, …but.”

“…But?”

“Just like I said to her that day, from the bottom of my heart, I’m grateful that she gave birth to Cedric.”

A small smile naturally crept to my face. I placed his large hand on my lap.

“When the time comes to tell him about Lady Sandra… I want to tell him that he was born out of love. After all, Lady Sandra… knew for a fact that he hated green peppers.”

“…I see.”

A gentle voice came from overhead, and my smile deepened as I pressed my body even closer to Lord William.

Ariana told me that muscles generated heat, so Lord William, with his well-trained body, was always so warm.

“Liliana, why don’t we visit Viscount Everett’s house in the near future?”

I looked up at the unexpected words and met the eyes of Lord William, who was smiling gently.

“It’s your mother’s family home. Your mother’s brother, Lord Rolf, has inherited the title, and the previous couple lived on the estate. They heard rumors that you were getting better and would be coming here during the next social season, and they wrote to me the other day saying they wanted to meet you.”

“But I’ve never met them before…”

“…Sandra tore every letter. When the letter arrived, she’d often whip you. So, Allwyn’s old butler told me not to get involved with the Viscount family anymore. If you don’t want to meet them, I’ll tell them…”

I didn’t know what to do. I wanted to meet my grandparents, but I didn’t know anything about them. I also never had any contact with them, so I was worried about meeting them.

“We can always postpone it for later. You can think about it slowly. If you can give me your answer by the end of the social period, it’ll suffice.”

“I understand, I’ll think about it.”

When I nodded, Lord William said that I could talk to him anytime. I nodded again and said yes.

“By the way, Lina.”

“Yes?”

“Rather than sitting beside me, why don’t you sit on my lap? I mean, this is great too, but the latter is definitely more fun!”

Looking at how serious he was, I thought he was going to broach an important subject, yet he said that.

“…I don’t want to do that in front of others.”

I pouted and moved away.

The other day, Gawain tried to make me sit on his lap and eat cake in front of everyone. I was so embarrassed, I just wanted the earth to swallow me whole.

“But the others are far away…”

“Even if that’s the case, they can still see us. I can see Ceddie sleeping on Father’s lap from here. Above all, it’s embarrassing.” I said, holding my cheeks with both hands.

Of course, I didn’t dislike being held on my dear Lord William’s lap, but it was embarrassing to do so in front of other people.

“Damn, if those bees hadn’t made their nest in the flower garden, I could’ve had you sit on my lap alone! I also wanted to get cozy with you!”

Lord William clenched his fists in frustration.

Two days before the picnic, a depressed Lord William told me that we couldn’t go to the flower garden he’d taken me to in the summer. Apparently, several large, ferocious bees that made their nests in the flower garden. The venom of the bees could be fatal, so we didn’t want to risk getting stung. To exterminate them, we had to wait until winter, when they were weak. As such, the flower garden was off-limits until spring.

It was a shame because I was looking forward to it, but I felt sorry for Lord William. He seemed even more depressed than I was! He must’ve been looking forward to the autumn flower field. When we went in the summer, he was overwhelmed with emotion.

“Lord William, I’m embarrassed to sit on your lap, but you’re welcome to use my lap as a pillow.”

“…Aren’t you embarrassed to let me use your lap as a pillow?”

“Not really. I let Ceddie and Sir Gawain use it… Huh? Lord William, do you not want to?”

“Of course I want to!”

Lord William nodded vigorously, stood up briskly, and gently moved me to the edge of the bench. After that, he laydown on the bench, resting his head on my lap.

I gently stroked Lord William’s beautiful amber hair as he looked up at me.

“I feel so happy when I stroke your hair. It feels like I’ve become your special someone.”

“What are you talking about? I only allow Lina to do this, so you’re definitely special to me. There has never been anyone with receding hairline in our family, but I’ll try to maintain my hair so that your happiness doesn’t decrease.”

Lord William spoke in all seriousness.

He was always honest with me, so I nodded in affirmation. I couldn’t help but smile.

“As I said this morning, this dress really suits you. Unfortunately, it was made by that Mario, but it really draws out your appeal.”

“Marietta’s design is very cute, but I’m happy that you chose it for me.”

Today’s dress was a calm rose pink. Lord William gave it to me last night as a gift for today. The moderate frills and understated lace were cute, and the three-quarter length sleeves were perfect for this season. The slender skirt was intricately embroidered with crimson thread at the hem. The chest area was clean, so it looked great with the sapphire necklace Lord William gave me.

Lord William caressed my cheek as if tickling me, then he sighed and looked beyond me toward the blue sky.

“It’s really nice weather today, isn’t it?”

“Yes.”

We chatted about trivial things, occasionally locking eyes and stroking each other’s hair and cheeks.

Then, thinking it was about time, Lord William got up, and we slowly started walking toward where Cedric and the others were walking.

“I have something important to tell you later.”

Lord William, walking next to me, looked away in an unusually hesitant tone.

“…Is it bad news?”

“No, it’s not sad, but it’s, well, it’s very important.”

I smiled and nodded, and Lord Wiliam’s expression relaxed as if he was relieved.

When we returned to where everyone was, for some reason, Lord William took me and we stood in front of them, who were lined up.

Cedric, who’d usually be the first to jump in, was smiling next to Gawain and looking my way.

“Cedric? What’s the matter?”

“Lady Liliana.”

I turned to face him and found Lord Wiliam kneeling before me.

His bright blue eyes stared straight at me.

I tilted my head, wondering if there was a serious issue.

“Lord William?”

“Liliana, as your husband, I feel I’m not good enough to make you proud. I’m always busy with work, so I don’t have much time for you and Cedric. As a knight, I’m fully aware of how dangerous my line of work is, and that I might lose my life anytime. So, I think there are times when you spend anxious nights.”

I didn’t know what was going on, but I had a premonition and stared at Lord William.

“My marriage to you was something I decided abruptly, so I didn’t have enough time. Our wedding was also subpar, and I neglected you even after we got married. To top it off, I lost my memory, which caused you a lot of trouble. But thanks to that, I was able to exchange my memories for something truly precious—something I’ve always wanted. I got someone to spend the rest of my life with.”

My hands were wrapped around Lord William’s.

I turned to face everyone else. They all had a gentle smile on their faces, while Elsa and Ariana were in tears.

“Until recently, the happiness between you and I was false. It was the product of my cowardice and your resignation. But from now on… I swear to love and protect you with my entire life. I promise to live even a day, an hour, or even a second longer than you, just as you wished. No matter how dangerous the mission, I swear to you, God, and the sword that I’ll return to you alive. These people here are witnesses.”

So, he cut off his words, let go of my hand, and reached into his pocket. He took out a small velvet box and opened the lid.

A platinum ring sparkled on a white silk base. A small blue sapphire sparkled in the center of the silver, rose-shaped work, and a large diamond sparkled next to it.

Lord William seemed very nervous, took a deep breath, and looked up at me again.

“Once again… Lady Liliana.”

My tears threatened to overflow, so I covered my mouth with both hands.

“I want you to marry me. I want to build eternal happiness with you and you alone.”

Suppressing my tears, I asked.

“…Are you truly alright with me?”

“I want you. …Liliana is the only one for me, so please marry me.”

“Yes, I want to be happy with Lord William as well, and no one else.”

I cried and laughed, nodding as hard as I could. In an instant, Lord William stood up and embraced me tightly, crying out, “Lina! I love you!” kissing me profusely.

“Congratulations, Will! Let’s have a banquet tonight!”

“Congratulations, Milady!”

“If you make Lily cry, I’ll take her! Caddock supports me in this!”

“If you make my precious Milady cry, I’ll kick you out!”

“If that happens, I’ll help you get rid of him, because I’ll be on Elsa’s side forever!”

“Liliana, if you ever feel like running away from home, come to your father’s house anytime.”

“The duke family is always waiting for you!”

“Can’t you guys celebrate properly?! Only Mario and Ariana are on my side! Are you even my friends?!”

“We’re just on Lily’s side, you know!”

“That’s right!”

“‘That’s right,’ my foot!”

While still hugging me, Lord William got angry at them. Cedric came running over and hugged us.

“Sister, Brother-in-law, congratulations!”

Lord William let go of me and picked up Cedric. Then, he handed him the ring.

“Cedric, if you agree to let me marry Liliana, would you please put the ring on her finger?”

“Yes!”

Smiling brightly, Cedric nodded and took the ring from Lord William without hesitation. He took my left hand tried his best to put the ring on my ring finger.

The ring on my left finger was the perfect size and was decorated with my favorite flower—rose—making it look very beautiful. But more than that, the meaning behind this ring made me happy. When our eyes met, Lord William smiled happily.

“Brother-in-law, please take good care of my sister.”

Cedric said to Lord William with a very serious look. Lord William’s expression turned stern as he looked straight into Cedric’s purple eyes.

“Yes. In the name of William Rutherford, I promise to protect you and Liliana more than anything else.”

Cedric’s round eyes blinked, his face twisted as he hugged Lord William. I followed suit, and Lord William’s strong arms held us tightly as always.

“I love you, my dear Liliana, my sweet Ceddie.”

We nodded again and again while crying to his soft, low, gentle voice.

The happiness overflowing in my heart was like a flower blooming one after another. Each time, it felt like the world was becoming more vivid, all because of him. I sincerely hoped that my one and only would be filled with the same amount of happiness.

“I love you, Lord William.”

As I said this, he looked up and kissed me on the cheek. Lord William narrowed his blue eyes, which I loved, and gave me a wonderful smile.

He probably didn’t know that single smile was enough to make me the happiest person in the world. Just seeing him smile made me truly, hopelessly happy.

The false happiness within my heart had vanished. What I had in my heart now was an eternal happiness that’d continue to shine forever, abundant with love.

“…Lord William, Ceddie, do you know?”

“What?”

They titled their heads quizzically, and I burst into a huge smile.

—Right now, I’m the happiest person in the world.

---

***T/N: We’re finally finished with the novell guyssss :333 I really love how pampered Liliana is by the ML throughout the story. Being utterly honest with you, when I saw how demure and passive she was at first, I was expecting it to be another one of THAT story. You know, where the ML kept tormenting the FL due to his past trauma and distrust.

But I really love this one. Take note, authors who wrote abusive stories: if you want to write pure heroine please make her be cherished for having kindness. Not make her a perfect abuse victim because she couldnt even defend her self

Please also consider donating to my ko-fi! It’ll greatly support me in action, no matter the amount!
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