Chapter Twenty-Nine: A Secret Illuminated by Moonlight

Feeling thirsty, I woke up to see the innocent sleeping faces of Cedric and Lord William, who had returned home for the first time in a while.

I didn’t know what time it was, but the light of the full moon streamed in through the window. Careful not to wake them, I slipped out of the bed, closed the curtains, and left the bedroom.

I went down the stairs to the kitchen and filled the glass with water. After drinking it, I took a deep sigh.

It had been a little over three weeks since I came here, and strangely enough, I felt like I could breathe easier in that small house than anywhere else.

The fact that I wasn’t wearing a corset also helped. The small world inside my small house was very peaceful. Precisely because it was small, I could keep an eye on everything, which made it all the more reassuring.

When I wasn’t helping Elsa and Frederick out, I would embroider at my leisure. The only visitors were Mario (and sometimes Marietta), and occasionally Ariana and Melissa. Prince Alphonse visited once, but then he got busy and I hadn’t seen him since.

While I was here, I wasn’t a marchioness, but Lina, the wife of a man who worked as a servant of the Order of Knights (or so the story went). Slowly, peacefully, time just passed, day after day.

Cedric also seemed to be having fun. He seemed to be enjoying gardening lately, and on their days off, Frederick and Lord William would tend to the flowers in the garden alongside the ecstatic Cedric.

I had discovered joy in cooking, and I looked forward to helping Frederick every day.

That night’s dinner was a cream stew that I had cooked entirely by myself.

I made a lot, but Lord William and Cedric kept asking for seconds, saying it was delicious, so everything disappeared in a flash. I was so happy and moved. I worked so hard to prepare it, and hearing them say it was delicious felt amazing.

I went to the living room and opened the curtains to see the garden.

“…Beautiful.”

The bright and dazzling full moon made the twinkling tiny stars lost their shine. Basking in the pale moonlight, the cosmos flowers in the flowerbed swayed in the breeze.

Since it was dangerous at night, we were told not to go outside, so it was a shame.

Realizing that I couldn’t go back to sleep, I moved the rocking chair next to me a little, spun it around, and sat down. I swayed back and forth as I peered outside the window through the gap in the curtains.

Before I knew it, the lively summer had turned into a forlorn autumn.

The town was very quiet as the world basked in the pale moonlight. The wind and the cries of autumn insects chirping somewhere in the garden told me the gentle flow of time.

“…Liliana.”

I flinched at the sudden voice.

Surprised, I turned around and found Lord William standing at the entrance to the living room.

“Ah, sorry, Lina. I must’ve scared you.”

I didn’t hear a single footstep, so I was too surprised to speak, so I just nodded. Lord William came over and stood next to me, slightly opening the curtains.

“Is it a full moon?”

“Did I disturb your sleep?”

I asked, staring at his profile as he looked up at the moon.

“Well, I woke up and didn’t see you there, so I wondered if something happened… You’re dressed very lightly. Here, put on my robe.”

Lord William took off his robe and handed it to me. I shook my head in panic and pushed the robe back.

“No, I can’t. What if Lord William catch a cold?”

“I won’t catch a cold from this.”

“Still, I mustn’t.”

I clenched my hands and pushed it back, refusing to accept it. Lord William pouted, then slowly helped me stand up as if he had thought of something. Then, he wrapped me in the big robe, picked me up, and sat me down on the rocking chair. Inevitably, I was on Lord William’s lap.

“Lord William—”

“—Look, the moon is so beautiful. This way, we’re both warm, and I’m having even more fun.”

Over the past few months, I had learned that Lord William wouldn’t let me off the hook, so I had no choice but to give up. I gratefully tried to put my hands through Lord William’s robe, but it kept slipping down my shoulders.

“…You’re so small.”

As he found my hand in his sleeve, he said that sincerely. When we put our palms together, the difference in our sizes was obvious.

The length and thinness of the fingers, the size, the thickness and softness of the palms were all different. His palm, which was a lot bigger than mine, was rough and calloused, probably because he had been holding a sword for a long time.

“Your hands are the hands of a knight. They are gentle hands that protect us.”

Next to Lord William’s blue eyes, I loved these hands.

After all, Lord William’s hands had always touched me and Cedric very gently, and held us tightly. These protective hands always continued to protect us sincerely. Because of the warmth of these hands, I was able to stand before my father, stepsister, and Sandra, who I was so scared of.

However, that was also why these hands couldn’t belong to me alone. He was the one who protected this country, supported Prince Alphonse, and protected all the people of the Kingdom of Cression.

“I heard about your secret from Count Eighton before he left for his territory.”

“I see.” I replied, looking down.

“Most of my memories are back. Only the last year or two remains vague to me.”

“…Is that so.”

‘Liliana, your dream is over.’

Hearing his voice, my heart, which should’ve been warm, grew cold.

It’s okay. It’s okay. I have Cedric. With him, I can do anything. I can overcome anything.

“I-I’ve learned the basics of cleaning and laundry, and I believe I can cook better if I read a book.”

“Hm?”

“Even though Cedric had a father, he never knew father’s love, but in the end… Through the kindness of Lord Will—forgive me, of the Marquis, he was able to know father’s love.”

“Hmm??”

“Marquis, I’m aware of how selfish this is, but I have a favor to ask of you. Could you please give me that sewing box and three days’ worth of clothes…? Surely, I’ll be able to work as a seamstress.”

“Wait, wait, wait, wait—! Please wait!”

Once morning dawned, I would get ready and leave the house. So, I tried to stand up, but Lord William embraced me and stopped me.

“Why did you suddenly talk about leaving…!?”

“…If you’ve regained most of your memories, then you’ll be fine without me… and besides, a woman with such a scar isn’t worthy of you.”

You won’t be anxious about your lack of memory anymore. In that case, you don’t need a wife figure.

I whispered, clutching my solar plexus tightly through my clothes.

I’d been prepared for this ever since Sandra revealed my secret. For the past three weeks, Lord William had been teaching me and Cedric, who only knew the life of an aristocrat, so that we could live in a monastery. I should be grateful that he gave us more than three weeks. But even so, my selfish heart ached, about to explode.

“No! Like I said, if you are leaving, I’ll abandon my pride and dignity as a knight, cry, cling to you, beg, prostrate myself, and even throw a tantrum!!”

I didn’t expect that from Lord William. Actually, I didn’t think Elsa would even go that far. When I looked up, I found Lord William staring at me, dead serious.

“But… wasn’t this commoner life just practice for Cedric and I to go to the monastery?”

“Absolutely not! There’s another, more important reason besides a change of pace!”

“Kyaa!”

Suddenly, Lord William stood up and picked me up, then put me back down in the rocking chair. For some reason, he kneeled right at my feet.

“Lord William?”

It was just like that day.

Lord William looked up at me just like the day he came to my room, still without memory.

“I knew about your scar because your father told me about it long before that mother and daughter did.”

“In that case…”

I lowered my face as if trying to escape from his direct gaze.

“I didn’t care either way.”

Not understanding the true meaning of his words, I tilted my head.

The way Lord William’s blue eyes sincerely gazed at me made me unable to entertain the possibility that he had lost interest and was abandoning me.

“Whether you have a scar or not, what matters to me is that you’re Liliana.”

His large hands reached out to cup my cheeks.

“No matter how ugly your scar is, I want you. I want you, Liliana, who always smiles gently and has a beautiful heart that never forgets kindness.”

How happy would I be if I could cling to his honest gaze, his warmth, and his kindness?

I gently pushed aside Lord William’s hands, which were on my cheeks, and stood up.

“Liliana?”

Lord William tilted his head, furrowing his brows in suspicion. I smiled back at him, and reached for the buttons of my nightgown. His blue eyes widened in shock.

I undid the buttons of my one-piece cotton nightgown one by one. My hands were shaking from fear and nervousness, so I couldn’t undo the buttons as I wanted. Regardless, I managed to undo the buttons until just below my belly button.

Then, I put my hands on the chemise underneath and slowly rolled it up with trembling hands. I didn’t know why, but tears were rolling down my cheeks and my hands wouldn’t stop trembling. I found it frustrating that my body refused to listen to me.

“I am by no means a beautiful person.”

Pale moonlight shone on it, before it was reflected in his bright blue eyes. At that moment, Lord William’s went wide and he gasped.

“I am… a wretched beast…—”

A bumpy scar stretched out from my solar plexus to the left waist, the skin around it discoloring to red and purple. In the process of growth, the skin had creased, leaving thin, cracked marks. The contrast with the white skin, which remained human-like, only made the ugly scar stand out more.

“…That day, the carriage suddenly halted, and a man with a short sword burst through the door. I was so scared, I rushed to grab my father, who was sitting across from me, and then… I was pushed away… The man swung down the dagger, the horses went wild, the carriage toppled over, and some kind of liquid was poured on my wound. I didn’t remember much from here on out, but… I heard the knight’s voice and the man ran away. The next time I woke up, I was in bed in my room.”

I lowered the hem of my skirt, which I had rolled up, to hide the scar.

“…I should’ve told you sooner… I’m sorry for deceiving you. I’m not beautiful… In reality, I’m not someone who deserves to be cherished or allowed to be selfish… I’m an ugly monster who deserves to be hated…—”

I wiped away my tears and forced a smile.

“You don’t have to force yourself to smile.”

Lord William stood up with an anguished expression and embraced me.

My body stiffened at the unexpected words.

As deep relief seeped into my heard, his voice quivered. No, it wasn’t just his voice. The arms and hands holding me were trembling just as much as his voice.

“These scars aren’t proof that you’re an ugly monster. They’re proof that you overcame pain and suffering, survived, and that you’re strong.”

I could feel his embrace loosening as the hand on my cheek urged me to look up. I saw Lord William smiling gently and crying.

“I’m glad you survived…”

I covered my mouth with both hands and looked up into his vivid blue eyes. If I hadn’t done so, I would’ve cried out loud.

Lord William leaned in, and his lips touched my cheek as if to erase my tears.

“Liliana, you’re not an ugly monster. I’ll say it as many times as it takes. It may be difficult to believe my words when I have no memory, but… I want you to believe me. I’ve decided I’ll never forget you again. Be it your smile, voice, manners, favorite flowers, favorite food, vegetables you dislike, favorite novels, everything—I will never forget. Nor would I ever forget this scar.”

A large hand touched my scar over my clothes. His touch was so gentle, as if comforting me, and I placed my hand above his.

“There’s no way I could hate you just because of this.”

My heart beat happily at his words.

“…Then,”

This time, I looked straight into his blue eyes.

“Don’t you forget.”

I said selfishly in a weak, small voice.

“If Lord William forgets me again… I’ll be so sad I’ll cry.”

The tears I had been holding back overflowed as I laughed, and they started spilling out one after the other.

“I won’t forget. I’ll never forget. I swear to God, the sword, and you that I’ll never forget about you, My Liliana.”

Lord William was also laughing while crying, and his tears were dazzling.

It was hilarious to see us both laughing while crying. Lord William wiped my tears away, saying, “We’re both in trouble.”

I reached out and erased Lord Wiliam’s tears with my outstretched sleeve.

I suddenly wanted to be pampered, so I rested my cheek against Lord William’s chest. Then, Lord William’s large hand gently stroked my head.

“By the way, does that wound still hurt? Did it hurt when I touched it?”

I looked up and shook my head.

“It doesn’t hurt anymore.”

“I see. I’m glad it doesn’t hurt.”

Lord William’s expression relaxed as if he was relieved. Overcame with affection, I leaned against Lord William once more.

“You’re so adorable.” Lord William said with a chuckle, before picking me up and sat down in the chair again.

As I sat on Lord William’s lap, the rocking chair started to sway. From behind his burly chest, I could hear the sound of his heartbeat, and my eyelids gradually became heavy. Lord William’s heartbeat must have had a soothing effect. His warm fingertips lightly held my hand, tapping a gentle rhythm and lulling me to sleep.

“Lord William.”

Drowsy and absent-minded, I looked up at him. His blue eyes narrowed gently, making me smile with joy.

I used to like pastel pink, but now blue was my favorite color.

“I love you.”

I whispered to myself, laughing softly, and closed myself, letting my sleepiness took over.

Come to think of it, what was the other important reason for being here?

If he didn’t mind telling me, I would ask him about it tomorrow morning. I thought so as I drifted off to a joyful slumber.

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